“No man is an island.” Effective communication is as important as how much you agree with this statement. Allow me to explain. Unless you live on an island alone, in my opinion, there is always a need for interaction with someone else. Moreover, we are social animals in need of some form of affiliation. Even someone who is very introvert would have cried out for milk when he was a baby, a form of communication.
If “you are what you eat” then “you are what you say and behave”. If you are effective in expressing your ideas, you are probably effective, at least to the listener listening for the first time. There may be exceptions but, I believe, human interaction time is often too little for an in depth understanding unless he or she is your close friend.
Personally, I feel that one way to improve effective communication is to get a boyfriend or girlfriend. A study that I once chanced upon suggested that girls develop their left brain whilst boys develop their right brain more. If you subscribe to the left brain right brain theory, you will know that the left hemisphere of your brain is responsible for spoken and written language whilst the right hemisphere results in more pragmatic males. Therefore, your boyfriend may help you make your communication skills effective, or your girlfriend may impart some of her communication skills to your already practical reasoning.
I can vouch for that. Being a chemistry major often obsessed with theories, my girlfriend had helped me better express my ideas minus the boring technicalities.
Lastly, I do not work for the Social Development Unit. =)
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ReplyDeleteIt is very interesting to know that having a boyfriend or a girlfriend will help someone improves his or her communication skill.
ReplyDeleteAfter giving some thought about it, I do agree with your suggestion. To me, your partner will be sincere and truthful when giving suggestions and you will not feel odd or embarrass to receive constructive criticism from her.
Ayu
Thanks for the insights, Elvin. I like the way that you approach this topic, moving from the more general to the more specific. I also agree that having close personal relationships might help us develop our interpersonal skills. (I'd say that rather than "effective communication" in general.) It's through that sort of relationship that we really learning the art of give and take (brain science aside).
ReplyDeleteHowever, just because people partner with others, this doesn't mean that they will assuredly become good communicators. Look at all the examples to the contrary!
Hi Elvin,
ReplyDeleteI agree with Brad that having a boyfriend or girlfriend doesn't necessarily mean that our communication skills will improve by leaps and bounds. On the contrary, I think that by having effective communication skills, one might improve the chances of getting a boyfriend or girlfriend instead. This is because I think that the most important thing in a relationship besides feelings is communication. Thus, pairing a couple together with very bad communication problems will only lead to serious issues in the future. Your post is a very interesting one though. Are you really sure that you are not an undercover SDU agent in disguise? :)
Wee Siong
This is quite a hilarious post. Your last sentence got me laughing out loud. But I have to follow a chinese saying that goes along the lines: " Water can cause a boat to float, but it can cause a boat to sink too". Having an "other half" may help, or it may not. It may help in the way you mentioned above, but it may hinder in the sense that you spend so much time trying to communicate with one person only, that you forgo trying to communicate with others. I believe communication is a very personal thing, and everyone communicates differently with everyone else. So, in doing the math, I believe having a healthy and relatively large group of honest (in a way that they'll point out your mistakes) friends is a better way of developing communication skills.
ReplyDeleteThough its always nice to have a soulmate whom'll understand you without even having you open your mouth. :)